yeah, both can have grave impacts on your life, well being and relationships. at least i found this to be the case for me. and things get easier, when those are out of the way. it’s not a bad point to start i guess and put some psychological energy towards. but i guess you are worthy of someones interest, care and love already. :)
i don’t think that’s true. you should be open and communicate well with new ppl in your life bc people do tend to be irritated and hurt, when you go in shutdown-mode. in my expirience. i dont know much about romantic relationships. but dont stop reaching out to people. these connections may hold you. they won’t be a magical cure. but they will give your life an anchor.
that said. online communities are not therapy. we don’t know you. for me it helped to start to know myself (through actual therapy). usually i noticed an upcoming depression 2 weeks to late. but i found patterns and have gotten better in listening to myself. i even started to build habits. not like “i’ll change my life now” but i found a few things that stuck and that i enjoy. its not perfect. but there is some structure to my weeks. (one might say i have a hobby now).
i hope you get out of this (at least a little). i’ve had a look outside of the cave. there is much waiting for us. even if we’ll have to go back inside from time to time.
this i an amazingly informative rendering.