Did you even read the post?

You have to like really fuckin hate each other to still get a divorce.

Musk wasn’t born in America, so he’s ineligible to run for president.

As long as the action terrorised a large enough group of people it’s terrorism, it’s just this time, the terrorised people are the rich cunts hiding in their mansions like the traitorous cowards they are.

He’s the only person I had any sympathy for, that was definitely his dad’s idea.

Well I don’t want to accidentally screenshot the porn I’m watching.

I never liked being told when to watch a certain show or have to deal with ad breaks, so as soon as I found out I could just Pirate things, I stopped watching normal tv, every so often if I’m at someone’s house or somewhere I’ll stare at it but mostly I haven’t watched tv in over 2 decades.

The internet tells me things going on in the world and my mate loves ranting about world news to me so I have my own news show.

I’d rather risk Steve jobs visiting me in the night, much safer option.

"Damn it Jeffery, because of you I have the mayor breathing down my neck, I’ve got the press ringing me every minute *phone rings* NO I DON’T HAVE A DAMN STATEMENT!.. Oh sorry chief, ok, yes sir, no worries… *slams phone down*

Now I have the chief of police is coming down to question me about this! I need your gun, your badge and those slices of bread in your pocket, on my desk NOW!"

The duck looks like it’s about to tell me this amazing financial opportunity that came across his desk this morning.

Way to early to ask for a threesome.

That’s what makes the internet so great!

I’ve been California sober for a year and I feel much better, I do miss drinking sometimes tho.

The thing about Arsenal is they always try to walk it in!

Him being fat is the only relatable thing about him.

Sometimes I think he forgets he’s there to be the science guy and makes it about himself a lot, but when he gets on a science rant that’s when hea good, just going on about his love of science and why it’s cool as fuck.

Getting James Cameron to fix the stars in the Titanic remake boosted his ego a little bit, but I get that, I’d be a bit ego filled if I was able to make James Cameron change something in his film.

Wait, Ben Shapiro has a talent?

Who?

Aight, I get why it’s called a bean now.

Make time speed up by hyper focussing on whatever is hitting that dopamine button untill I’m no longer allowed to stare at it or I fall asleep.