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Cake day: August 1st, 2023

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  • My body broke down. I’ve bene pishing myself at work for years and my body just shut down.

    I had no medical issue. Went through tests and scans. Been probed more than I could imagine. Nothing wrong. It was the stress level that rose so hard that my mind said ‘nope’. So technically a burnout without the mental burden.

    So I stayed at home for a week and declined my doctor’s advice to stay at hope for a few months and take therapy. I went back to work with all the figures I could gather. Asked for a meeting with my manager and the CEO and played out my results. I was generally overachieving by 400%.

    They agreed to let me decide where to cut in ly work load so I kept everything that fulfills me or the stuff that I’m really good at. I’m still carrying a heavier load than my colleagues but I love my job.

    That didn’t help with the fact that I couldn’t walk for 2 minutes. I couldn’t take one flight of stairs. So I started going to the gym. I was a bit overweight but only about 8 kilos so nothing really worrying. In a few months that fat was turned into muscle. I go to the gym about three tiles a week and I feel revived. Generally excersizing improves my mood.

    Lastly I started takingly ADD meds again but with weekly doctor visits in the first months to get the meds and dosage just right. Not to much, just a hand on my back that gives a little push instead of the heavy dose that draged le throigh ly daus when I was younger. That also had a big influence on my family as I’m more present at home now. I can carry a part the mental load that my wife used to pull by herself and I seel to be more considerate to everyone at home. I’m in sync with their schedules now.

    So, in 2024 I crashed and burned and rose as a Fenix.