Or sometimes… (googles “Boeing whistleblowers”) they just kinda…

The genocides will continue until morale improves.

Ariana

I counted stuff. Worked in a paper products warehouse doing daily inventory counts. It was kind of awesome since I got to walk around, BS with some friends that had other jobs in the warehouse, and developed boss-level skills with the number pad that I still apply today. After working the summer there, I was pretty glad my first couple applications in food service got rejected.

I hold my work laptop like this around the office specifically for the “fuck this place” vibe

Yeah, dumbshits may not even deport you back to your home country. You from Egypt? Maybe just put you on this plane to El Salvador. Close enough, right?

Talking out of turn… that’s a paddling.

Martin, right? I will accept that I may have misunderstood the joke.

Let’s have multiple reboots going at the same time. I think it would be great to have like three reboots of Jurassic Park going at the same time with different directors. I want to see a full length Wes Anderson take on the film, but also a Zach Snyder take and maybe a Danny Boyle take competing on the same weekend.

I kinda want to go other direction.

Dice Hard

Do you mean like if an alien just showed up on my doorstep and was like, “take me to your leader”? Because I would ask, “How about we just chill here for a bit?” because nothing good is going to come from the next part.

“Bible” is such a weird way to spell Epstein files.

Mitch McConnel could beat Trump in a physical fight, and really should.

What is the answer to life the universe and everything? You know, just for confirmation.

If the notion that “AI is coming for your job” now includes making Zuckerberg unemployed, I’m cautiously on-board with this new development.

I tried signing up for eHarmony, back when that was a thing. I find it funny now because I’m happily married, but when I set up my profile the website basically told me that it couldn’t match me with anyone. Felt like shit for a while, but then I realized it’s the apps that are full of shit. Meeting people doesn’t take an app, and sometimes the apps proactively make meeting people more difficult.

“Awww, ya got me! Hehe”

Going to be checking Google maps for the Gulf of America Iran in the morning.

Yeah, firefighters are in the same class as lifeguards. They’re protecting people from forces of nature, and don’t have any ideology that is central to their work other than “save lives”.

What, with like an auto-pen or something?