The government’s job is to give punk rockers something to sing about

Elon Musk is part of the administration that is helping us identify where we can find…savings.

I wonder what she almost said

Ok, news break! The President of the US is the most obvious foreign actor the country has ever had. This is like if Benedict Arnold was actually President while trying to overthrow the government, then running again and winning. His main goal is to weaken the US as much as possible for his daddy, Putin. If this appointment surprised you, get ready. It’s gonna get a lot worse.

I can’t imagine a legit celebrity musician coming up with a better music video. Nothing staged is going to beat a “nothing can phase me” dance video during a real live coup.

“Home Depot™ Presents the Police!®”

computer money invented to buy drugs

“Subway™ Eat Fresh and Freeze, Scumbag!®”

I shot the mailbox again, on purpose.

Oikos™ Greek Yogurt Presents Handcuffs®

Years ago, a central banker killed my partner.

he swiped his credit card to pay me for arresting him.

I haven’t laughed this much in sooooo long! omg lmaoooo All those ™ and ® in the stupid commands omg I can’t rn

lol, I get that part, but how can they assess the presence of weapons if it’s blurred.

I believe ✌👽

You are welcome

I was there when he told me, a stranger he met at the Applebee’s Bar that night after he was hitting on my 8-month pregnant wife then tried to pretend he wasn’t after she introduced me to him as her husband, the story while he was drunk.

Reminds me of when I saw a Mountain Spring Water filling station ornamented with a picture of a snow-capped mountain at a Wal-Mart about 500 miles from the nearest mountain and nearly 2k miles from the nearest snow-capped mountain. The thing had pipes out the back going into the wall. That was straight city water that maybe that dispenser filtered a little more if it was properly maintained.

El queso esta viejo y podrido 🦕

And you don’t want to accept it because that would mean disappointment again.

Yeah, I’m being silly.

Isn’t a counterexample just one datum? Even though its only one case, it’s still science.

FTFM

What’s the point of scanning someone at that level of precision if they can’t even see it? Seems pretty pointless to me.

Isn’t a counterexample just da tomb? Even though its only won case-a-dilla, it’s still le sahyênçe.

So TSA is practically seeing everyone naked? Is that for real?

It’s a quote from The Big Lebowski

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-eDOJ4L0Edk

You look for the person who will benefit…And, uh…You know, you’ll, uh…You know what I mean.

Harriet, I have spoken!

Congrats! I’m excited to see your upcoming posts on distro hopping.