Scrolling
⬇️
Sleep
⬇️
Go back to sleep because can’t think of what to do
⬇️
Wake up
⬇️
Still can’t think of anything to do ^(cba to wait for inspiration)
⬇️
Scrolling
This is what my weekends look like when I fail to find an event to go to in time.
The problem is that most tasks require
- Inspiration, which it usually takes several minutes of staring into the void (fun!) and waiting for an idea to get.
- Structure. I think this is broken in my brain because whenever I need to structure a task it’s super tiring, and that’s why I always revert to scrolling, which is unstructured. In scrolling the need to plan is replaced by an impulsive response to whatever happens to appear on your feed.
What does the diagram even look like for normal people? When do they get inspiration? How do they decide that now is the time to do thing no. xyz? What do I do about it hurting to structure free time activities (I’ve found strategies to navigate cooking etc)? Is there an alternative structureless passtime* to scrolling?
*(I’m actually able to structure when I do things with other people, but there are days when nobody’s around which leaves me helpless)
The thing is, I don’t feel depressed (I have for short periods in my life so I know when I do). And whenever there’s school/a social event I go to it and I’m happy. I only get into this loop at weekends when there’s nothing to do. I could solve this by getting a job at the weekends (ie. again getting someone to structure my time for me). But the problem would persist that I’m unable to structure my free time due to executive dysfunction.