Because I don’t, and pretending to feels dishonest. I’ll listen if they want to talk about it, but I’m not going to act interested, and I certainly won’t ask about it on my own. What I’m trying to figure out is whether people actually care, or if they’re just playing a social game that I’m simply not interested in.
I’m probably on the autistic spectrum, which likely explains this to some extent. But that’s not an excuse - being an asshole is perfectly compatible with autism, so before dunking on me, please realise I probably agree with your criticism.
Very, very, VERY few people actually care about other people’s kids. And that interest only goes up slightly when they are related to the child.
Nothing wrong with you feeling that way.
As for vacations, life events, etc., I’m interested in knowing what goes on in my friend’s lives… that’s kind of what having a friend is about.
BUT… I’m interested in hearing about these things face to face. I couldn’t care less if they’re just social media spam about what they did with their spouse. That’s one reason why I stopped using social media.
I dunno. I always ask my friends what their kids are up to and am interested to hear. It’s usually entertaining or enlightening. I love talking about my kid and most parents are the same way. Tho I have a few friends who don’t feel comfortable talking about their kids for various reasons so I don’t ask them.
Totally agree, when it’s on social media, I don’t care at all about it, just another thing to upvote and scroll on by
If I’m talking to them, whole different story, because then it’s more personable
I think your characterization is probably somewhat incorrect. I care, and I have seen other parents care. Maybe single childless people don’t care, but this is not always the case.
I care about other people’s kids. I want them housed, fed, clothed, etc.
I want my tax dollars to improve other’s lives so they have what they need to be self-actualized human beings.
I won’t let them get hurt at the playground if I can help it.
I watch them when they cross the street to make sure they do it safely.
I have little ones myself and I believe it takes a village. I’m also 37 and a German/US dual national. I was raised to care, and the societal standards for the US are not a one size fits all definition globally. My wife is Latina and her family is friendly to all children and show lots of care. Germans watch out for others’ kids as they walk to school or play on the playground. It’s disappointing to hear that the fake niceness of the US really is fake here but not very surprising. You truly can’t relate to each other. I am glad I’m moving out next year.
Yes yes. I know this is the internet and kids bad, but I do enjoy when a child smiles or has a small victory. And I enjoy seeing my friend’s children be friends with mine and grow up together.
TLDR some of us care and love to see pictures and hear about your kids.
Oh geeze, yeah, I hope that what I wrote didn’t come off as “not caring” about the wellbeing of other people’s children, because that’s absolutely not what I meant!
What I mean is that most people don’t get excited about when someone else’s child just spoke their first word, or took their first step. They really don’t, because it’s not a milestone that impacts that person’s life in any meaningful way.
When someone sends you baby picture after baby picture, or their kid’s school trip photos… nobody actually “cares” about those things. It occupies no space in their head past that brief moment they were told about it. That’s what I mean.
If those things make you happy, there’s nothing wrong with that, either!
Do cute kids put a smile on my face? Of course. But do I care that an acquaintance’s child now uses the potty? Not. At. All.
Thanks for clarifying. Seems I misread your intent. Apologies for that. Take care.